The Princess and I in One Pot of Porridge
“Keep smiling. The fuck you smiling about?!”
After one slap, the Princess slapped me again. There was no way that she could pretend that I didn’t grope her last night. She pulled her heroic eyebrows together tightly and glared at me with her gaze that was sharp as steel when she hit me.
The majority of the emotions in her eyes were admonishment and disappointment. Shyness took up only a tiny portion. Normal girls would be crying and screaming if a male stranger groped her. The tougher girls would explode on the spot and fight you to the death.
I can say with absolute certainty that Boss Shen would pass on talking and smash his nuts with an inkstone. Shiyi would definitely wear on a radiant smile and ask him, “who touched me?” and then the moment he’s not paying attention, she’ll castrate him.
‘Sometimes, Shiyi’s smile scares even me…’
Only the Princess didn’t seem to take it to heart. She wasn’t angry over being touched; she was disappointed with me as a person.
I suddenly felt a desire to reflect on myself…
‘But I didn’t voluntarily touch you! It was you who grabbed my hand and… Ah, fine. It’s Shiyi’s mess, so I’ll take the blame for her.’
I scratched my head, “Sorry, Your Highness, it was my fault for not finding out the cause in time and capturing the malicious culprit. I should not have smiled, either. I understand that it is a big deal for females; I was rash.”
Truth be told, I was partly to blame, as I wanted to capture the culprit, and therefore deliberately left Five Plucks Heart Enchantment Pill on the candle. I wouldn’t have been able to lure Shiyi, otherwise. As a consequence, I felt a teeny bit of guilt toward the Princess.
The Princess didn’t seem to think that I’d apologise so easily; hence, she froze for a moment. She stopped to think for a moment then looked up. She calmly asked, “Was there really a malicious culprit? When you gave chase yesterday, who did you see? Was it a male or female? Were they tall or short? Slim or fat? What was their goal in harming you?”
“When I chased the culprit outside, I saw that the culprit had their face covered and was dressed in black clothing. Their qinggong was also very advanced. He leapt from roof to roof. You see, I chased him all night, but could not catch him in the end.”
My explanation was sound and reasonable; however, the Princess didn’t buy it. She folded her arms. Despite her folding her arms before her chest, her voluptuous peaks didn’t change shape much. From this angle, they look phenomenally perky. Add that with her unleashing her lust last night – which caused her messy hair and unkempt appearance – the folding arms action became a sight to behold, especially since we were on the bed with the curtains down.
The Princess didn’t realise how charming she looked at the moment. She seriously said, “Ming Feizhen, be honest with me. If the culprit’s qinggong was advanced, how did you catch up on feet, let alone run after them for the entire night? Additionally, my visit was not planned, so nobody knew. Why did the culprit sneak into your room when there’s nobody present to use an aphrodisiac on you?”
‘The Princess’ logic is sound, yes, but she didn’t plant it to use on you, but us! Shiyi intended it for it to be used on me and her! Who would’ve expected you and Su Xiao to come inside in the middle of the night? That part wasn’t part of her plan.’
No, no, no, don’t take this in a crooked direction. Shiyi didn’t want to drug me to do that happy stuff we can’t tell children; she most likely intended to use it as a truth serum to ask me questions she had for me.
News of me becoming a Fuma Candidate probably spread. Being unsettled, Shiyi probably wanted to ask if I wanted to marry the Princess.
‘Jeez… What’s so good about being Fuma? It’s boring… Why did Shiyi think that I wanted to be Fuma?’
Since I couldn’t answer, the Princess’ gaze became sterner.
“It’s a private item you use to trick girls, isn’t it? Liu Shan Men’s courtyard is split in two. On the other side is where the female constables reside. Yiren told me that she carefully picked and personally trained close to a hundred female constables, with none who would bring shame the word beauty. You were planning to go after them, weren’t you?!”
The Princess gained more and more confidence as she spoke while the fire in her eyes burnt hotter and hotter.
‘I can’t be any more innocent!’
‘I’m not capable of the complex task of putting the drug into the candle, yes, but that’s no reason to frame me! Shiyi is much defter with her hands compared to me!’
‘Plus, those female constables that were trained by Boss Shen are tough as nails. They probably have no issues in fights! Who in their right mind would dare to provoke them?!’
“I get it now.” The Princess puffed her face. Her stern gaze turned even sharper, “I’ve investigated you. Besides continuously hearing that you like men…”
“Hey! We already clarified that matter yesterday!”
“Shut up! Clarified what?!”
The Princess raised her hand for no other reason than to punch me in my nose! The pain made me hold my face.
“The only thing proven by what you did to me is that you like men and women!”
‘Who likes men and women?! Who has that big of an appetite?! Ninety percent of the news you heard was from people prejudice against me, while the other information was just absolute rubbish!’
“To add to that, your alias, Liu Shan’s Plague… whoever touches you will be unlucky.”
‘Okay, don’t bring up that alias! I was set up; then your old man decided to officially acknowledge it! I, too, am in despair over it!’
“Now I feel that it’s not that simple. They were definitely set up by your schemes, and these accidents are the result of that.”
The Princess’s gaze was stern as though she was all the more confident in her deduction.
‘The others all said that my fortune is bad and will curse people to death!’
“I have already confirmed it… Ming Feizhen, you’re Mount Daluo’s most rebellious disciple, a disgrace to the orthodox sects in the martial world!”
That sort of ticked me off to hear.
‘Even if I did touch you a few times, how does that make me a disgrace to the orthodox sects in the martial world? My Shifu bedded so many girls; you think that touching them was all that he did? He… He’s even revered! I hate you fake morals preaching orthodox people the most!’
The Princess threw yet another punch, but I blocked it with my hand.
She used a surprisingly big amount of force. The Princess trained in sabres and broadswords since a young age; her arms were, therefore, particularly strong. To my surprise her punch wasn’t any weaker than Jin Wangsun’s aide, the big man, A-Hu!
‘Fuck, Princess, how much effort did you devote to your sabre training?!!’
“You…” The Princess bit down on her lip then anxiously said, “Let me punch you!”
“Be reasonable! I didn’t do anything…”
The moment I said that I didn’t do anything, a flush appeared on the Princess’ pretty face. She seemingly recalled lots of things from last night.
‘Oh, so you didn’t remember it all before, that’s why you wanted to hack me to death before you even saw me!’
Her fist was currently connected to my palm, which apparently led to her recalling the feeling of touching me last night.
“You… you!” The Princess grumpily asked, “I just want to punch you; you going to let me punch you or not?”
‘Who does this?!’
‘You can’t just hit somebody this way even if you’re worse at expressing yourself with words, can you?!!’
Before we were finished with the ruckus, we suddenly heard knocks at the door. However, the knocker just knocked for the sake of knocking.
“Ming Feizhen. Ming Feizhen, are you there?”
It was Liu Yuan’s voice. Additionally, judging from the footsteps, a few of them seemed to have come.
From the way they knocked for the sake of knocking, I knew that they weren’t planning to wait for me to respond. In essence, calling out to me was just protocol; should I not open up, they’ll immediately push the doors open and enter.
I swiftly asked, “What? What do you so early in the morning?”
Liu Yuan responded, “What, you’re in the right now? How many days have you been absent from meetings now? You haven’t completed a single task Vice-captain left you with when she left. We need to have a meeting now.”
“Huh? A-A meeting?”
Liu Yuan fumed, “Of course. We have lots of problems to go through at the moment, while you have never attended the meetings. There are lots of things awaiting a decision. Therefore, you have to attend the meeting today no matter what.”
‘What do I do?’
I sent the Princess a signal with my gaze. She, too, was worried.
“We’re coming in!”
Accompanying the sound of the door creaking, Liu Yuan entered as soon as he pushed the door.