“That was the happiest time in mommy’s life. Mommy ate with your father every day, chatted with him, learnt the elven language, and learnt swordsmanship. Perhaps mommy was a born swordplay genius, hehe. Mommy isn’t bragging. Mommy only stayed there for two years, but when mommy left, not even your dad could beat me. Lorana is also a very formidable swordswoman. I think she is the strongest on the continent even though she’s an elf.
I hunted and lived with the elves during the day. I lay on the grass and chatted, I bathed with that woman by the river, and we’d share the same bed and chat at night. At the time, that woman and I were very close. We always hugged each other when we slept. I don’t know when I fell for your dad either. I was also aware that that woman had always liked her brother. However, after spending time together for over a year like that, we confessed under a tree.
I can still see that large tree in my dreams. It was so large it looked like it ascended into the clouds. The vacant area was a rare sight in the forest and there was only that large tree there. That night, your dad and I snuck out. He looked at me and made a ring out of grass, wore it onto my ring finger, and proposed to me.
That was silly, wasn’t it? I was that silly back then. He said that when elves decide to propose own their own accord, they needed to propose underneath the ancient tree, but since the ancient tree wasn’t there, he just proposed under that tree. I was very stupid back then. I was so stupid I was moved to tears by the ring your dad made out of grass. After I agreed, we hugged and kissed, becoming a couple under that tree. Perhaps it was after that time that you came into the world and shared my body.
If I think about it now, it wasn’t blissful at all back then. Sometimes we’d have nothing to eat. There were no berries during winter. Even animals were a rare sight. We had no salt, so we had to lick rocks for salt. We even had to melt snow to drink during winters. But thanks to the miraculous medical practices of the elves, I never had to go through any torturous sick experiences.
But even so, that period of time was as beautiful as a fantasy. I had my lover, my friend, and you, my beloved son. Back then, after that woman found out that we were a couple, she wasn’t particularly sad. She even gave us her blessings. I ran away from marriage but ended up finding true love, and the princess and prince got together like in a fairy tale. Your father and I truly believed that after completing our training and returning to our respective nations, humans and elves would be able to communicate, and like us could definitely get to know each other and fall in love with each other.
But we couldn’t realise our ideal. My belly soon caught the attention of Lorana. As an elf, she was enraged. She forced me to leave. Elven royalty will not accept mixed blooded off-spring. Not even normal elves could accept mixed-blooded elves. Mixed-blooded elves are seen as filth. I’m not sure where we got the courage from, but your father and I eloped.
I don’t know how long we ran for, but my body started to give in. After brooding for a long time, your dad decided to let me give birth to you at an elf village. That village produced gold. The villagers didn’t reject the weak me, and to the contrary, treated me passionately, allowing me to give birth to you in the village.
Son, you have no idea how happy I was when I saw you. When I opened my eyes and saw you breathing by my side, I was so happy I almost passed out. I just wanted to hold you every day, and kiss you on your forehead every day. You were so gentle back then. When I fed you, you never bit me. You would gently place your hands on my breast and smile afterwards.
While it was only a few days, I truly couldn’t be without you. I cried even if we were apart for a single second. I loved you far too much. You were my first child, and still my only child. I can’t live on without you. At the time I thought to myself, it didn’t matter where I went as long as I had you.
But your dad was the next elf king. How could the elves allow him to elope with a human woman? That woman’s ability is mind-reading. She knew where your father would run right from the beginning. She came towards us step by step and finally arrived at the front of our door. Behind her were the imperial guards that rushed over from the imperial capital.
At that time, I found out that my father, brother, and home had all been destroyed. I broke down and wanted to bring you back here, but I knew that I might bring harm to you if I brought you with me. And so, I left you behind to your dad. He was the elven king, so he could give you a better life. I don’t know how I immediately left. I just heard your cries from behind. I cried loudly as I rode away until I fell asleep. And when I awoke, I cried again. I just went in the direction I assumed was right. I don’t know how long I rode for before finally seeing the destroyed imperial capital.
I charged into the palace. After killing a few people I ran out of energy. The leader of the barbarians stripped me down completely, called all of his men over, chopped my father’s head off, filled it with wine and placed it before me. If I refused to drink it, he was going to have his men rape me. To this day, I can still remember the bloody taste of that wine. After I drank it, I could virtually see my father’s gaze on me. That gaze has stayed with me forever until I cut the barbarian leader’s head off and skinned him. His skin which I used to make a wine pouch is still hanging on my wall.
Lots of people in the imperial capital were killed back then, and the national treasury was essentially empty. I succeeded the throne, but all I had was an empty and abandoned nation. I was grieving my brother and father’s death, and I was missing you every moment. I didn’t do anything during that period of time. I just sat on the throne in a daze tearing up every day.
After that, I learned that your father had succeeded the throne. Lorana came before me and told me your dad married his sister, succeeded the throne as the elf king and not to worry as you were well. Your father sent Lorana here to help me with my struggle. She brought your father’s long elf king sword and cape which he gifted me. Your dad placed a spell on the cape he gave me, so when I drew my sword, time slowed down while it looked as though nothing had changed in the eyes of others. So while things had slowed down for me, things looked equivalently faster in the eyes of others. Right now, I am capable of moving sixteen times faster than what others see. I was relieved to know that you were well, and I focused on revenge. I smashed the throne, extracted the gold, tore down everything in the palace that contained gold, and sold paintings, armours, vases, and I even tore down two palaces to sell their materials off. I used the money earned from it to raise an army.
I trained my army every single day. After my army subdued the barbarians close by using just guns and cannons, other nations saw me as a threat and declared war on me. I led my army and conquered lands everywhere, regardless of sand storms, heavy snowfall, torrential rain or blazing heat. We fought on plains, mountains, and in marshes. I saw lots of bloodshed and killed lots of people. I conquered nations and destroyed dynasties. All I had in mind was conquest, slaughter, conquest, slaughter, conquest, slaughter…… When I finally tired, I had created an empire four hundred times the size of Rosvenor.
When I ascended the throne and became the empress, I got back my throne, palace, lands and pride. However, I still missed you as I sat on my throne. I desperately wanted to see you. It had been eight years. I couldn’t stop imagining how handsome, cute, tall and masculine you were at eight years old. I wanted to know if you were naughty or cultured and quiet like a young girl. I had subdued the lands. I felt like it was time to bring you home. It was time I went to see my husband and kiss my child.
And so on that day, I once again entered that forest alone on my horse……”