Nothing More Tragic in Life (Part 2)
I calmly said, “This humble one is blessed by Vice-captain’s kindness. Vice-captain Shen’s breasts are large and pretty (meant: she’s very nice to me), how could I possibly desert her?”
Prime Minister Li Si stroked his beard. He smiled and remarked, “Your genuine and situational thoughts have been mixed together! Kid, are you still not awake?”
“Oh, did I?” I tried to play it off as if I was just trying to humour him, “This humble one is muddle headed; this humble one does not have the qualifications to work under your leadership, and therefore can only thank you for your generous offer.”
“If you don’t want to, this old one won’t force you. Otherwise, if Vice-captain Shen comes to this old one’s door, this old one would not be able to able to handle her temper, hehehe.”
I laughed along with him.
“May this humble one ask how this humble one can be of use to you, Prime Minister?”
Prime Minister Li Si chuckled, “Is it safe to assume that you have heard this old one’s journey as an official?”
I froze for just a moment before replying. “Erm, well, everyone praises you; they say, so the wind blows, so the grass bends. The grass cannot help but bend…”
“Heh, that’s a compliment? Master Ming, do you truly consider this one old and senile?” Prime Minister Li Si smiled, “True, I am grass, but I am grass that sways with the wind, am I right? They thought that this old one is deaf, but this old one is not ashamed about it, for they are right. This old one sways with the wind.”
Prime Minister Li Si was complaining, but at the same time, had the suave and unbothered tone of, “People mock me for being crazy, while I mock them for not knowing better.”
I formed a cupped fist salute, “From this humble one’s perspective, it is most certainly praise. Many things in life are beyond one’s control, especially when dealing with the separate factions in the imperial court. This humble one is afraid that there would not be a second individual in the entire imperial court who could safely watch the fire burn from safety with their arms folded as you do.”
“From the very first time this old one met you, this old one immediately knew that we were one of a kind.”
“If we continue with this chat, we may never reach the conclusion. Therefore, this humble one shall ask you a third time: may this humble one ask how this humble one can be of use to you, Prime Minister?”
“You’re a hasty one. Fine, I shall tell you.” Prime Minister Li smiled, “It’s very simple. I want you to do nothing.”
“Do nothing. You, Ming Feizhen, are to just stay home and do nothing aside from wait, understood?”
I carefully deliberated what he said. He suddenly appeared at Heavenly Fragrance Garden most probably because he received a report that Jin Wangsun’s people barged into the place. However, as the man in charge of Heavenly Fragrance Garden, he spared us posers. Then when the assistant minister and generals’ people came to beat me up, he helped me sweep it under the rug.
I suddenly understood where he was taking it, so I smiled, “I, Ming Feizhen, naturally never did anything. The one responsible for causing trouble was, of course, someone else.”
“Smart kid.” The old prime minister then flipped his cultured image on its head and elatedly said, “This old one is not bothered by drifting along with the current; however, if someone wants to push the fence this old one is sitting one, this old one shall push it back. That is a principle this old one must uphold.”
I contemplated and contemplated; my eyes then lit up, and I instinctively let out an emotional sigh, “That day, Jin Wangsun sent hit so many people. Indeed, he hit His Majesty and his father-in-law, but the one person who he never should have laid hands on was you.”
My original plan was just to give Jin Wangsun some trouble so that he didn’t have spare energy to give me grief. Never did I imagine that the Prime Minister wanted to personally give him a piece of his mind.
The Prime Minister laughed, “Haha, you have confused this old one with that. This old one is merely upholding justice; what personal vendetta do you speak of?”
‘Everything about it is a personal vendetta! You initially supported the Emperor in crowning Jin Wangsun as Fuma, didn’t you?! You’re now leading the attack on him, because he sent someone to hit you!’
The old prime minister shook his head, “This old one merely heard that Jin Wangsun led a group to barge into Heavenly Fragrance Garden. He drank alone in the front hall and audaciously called for more than eighty girls to keep him company…”
‘Isn’t that Su Xiao that you’re talking about?! That’s not called ‘calling for more than eighty girls to keep him company’; those eighty plus girls threw themselves at him!’
“In addition, he hit over dozens of wealthy individuals in the city. General He couldn’t stand his absurd behaviour, and thus, sent men to deal with him, yet he unreasonably assaulted them. He even assaulted the assistant minister who passed by the place. He was truly audacious beyond words.”
‘You officials are specialists with that trick, huh?! You just planted all of my deeds on Jin Wangsun without batting an eye. Why would General He be displeased with what he saw happening in a brothel?!! Does he live nearby?! Also, how did the assistant minister coincidentally pass by this place? Where was he originally planning to go?!’
“Seeing as that was true, I had to do what was right; I, therefore, teamed up with twenty officials to report his heinous deeds to the imperial court!”
I was absolutely stunned. In a dumbstruck manner, I said, “But the assistant minister and general, twenty…”
The prime minister waved me off and revealed a smug grin, “Heh, what’s so hard about that? Assistant Minister Lu is this old one’s pupil; General He is this one’s maternal grandson. The other eighteen other officials are all with this old one. What are you worrying about so much for?”
‘This old man has literally recruited half of the imperial court to get back at one man.’
The prime minister then stroked his beard as if to suggest that his predictions were all on the mark. He acted sort of similar to Great Duke Jiang sitting at the platform to fish while emitting his divine aura as he slowly said, “This old one has staged a three-pronged attack. I have men at Shuntian Office, the Qilin Guards and your Liu Shan Men to surround his place’s door and interior so that he can’t move around freely even in his own estate. If he behaves obediently, so be it. If he dares to resist, heh…”
A cold look appeared in the prime minister’s eyes. He looked at me and made a neck slitting motion with his hand.
‘Fuck! I think your temper is too fiery, Prime Minister! Are you waging a war or exacting vengeance?!’
‘Not even I am as angry as you with the punk after he snatched my Night Fortress.’
‘I have to say this again: Brother Big Vat, it’s fine for you to offend me, but if you offend a man that would drag you to hell with him, there’s no way that you’ll be able to defend against him!’
After the Prime Minister and I forged a cohesive testimony together, I left the room. The men in black in the corridor had been cleared from the corridor. Needless to say, the credit belonged to the Prime Minister’s. He was the one in charge of Heavenly Fragrance Garden. Therefore, it was only normal for him to deal with such things.
After leaving the room, I found that it was still day. I finally realised that I had slept for an entire day and night. It was now afternoon the next day.
‘Shit! I didn’t contact Shiyi; I don’t know how Su Xiao and Tang Ye are doing, either.’
When I asked around, I learnt that Su Xiao left on his own after drinking, and apparently, a girl with a face veil took him away. It was probably Shiyi. She saw Su Xiao on Liu Shan Men’s recruitment day and knows that he’s my friend. I, therefore, would assume that she’d help me look after the drunken kitten.
When I inquired about them with some more people, they told me that Tang Ye had left. That baffled me; Tang Ye didn’t seem to have any urgent business. He left without even letting me know. He should’ve told me what he learnt from Miss Qing’er.
When I asked two more people, they said that Tang Ye apparently conversed with Miss Qing’er for an entire night…
‘I see… wait a minute. One night?!’
‘Tang Ye is famous for being muscle bound and a man of few words. He could chat for an entire night?’
The first scenario that popped into my mind wasn’t a good one.
‘A young man and woman alone in a room for one night? Miss Qing’er is young and pretty. If sparks flew and something sensual happened, then Big Golden Vat would go crazy with anger, wouldn’t he…? Wait, no. That wooden-faced martial-art-training-obsessed Tang Ye wouldn’t do that, would he?’
At most, Tang Ye would calmly ask me, “What could happen?”
That was how Tang Ye should react. The issue was that I couldn’t be certain, and hence, I quickly ran out to give chase.
*General He – The ‘He’ is pronounced ‘her’.
*Great Duke Jiang refers to Jiang Ziya. I’ve given background information on him before, so I won’t bore you again.